@AlisonLeiby mine is just ‘don’t wear a bucket hat again u can’t pull it off’

I hope one day I’m happy enough to hold my coffee with both hands

New Ken doll body type ideas:

-played sports in high school
-“Tinder tall”
– basement gamer
-dad bod
– crossfit zealot

More like “it’s a date” amirite https://t.co/dL6FojGraE

Show me a Barbie with one boob slightly bigger than the other and then I’ll use the words “real woman”

When I’m in charge, Oscar presenters will be exes who don’t find out until they’re on stage. PLEASE WELCOME RACHEL MCADAMS AND RYAN GOSLING.

me, without money: money is the root of all evil. the things u own end up owning u

me, with money: ya can i get 20 mcchickens

The Barbie doll now comes in curvy, tall, or petite body shapes; meanwhile Ken’s body shape is still primarily offered as “nub for a peen”

Trump: I Refuse To Take Questions From Someone Who Reminds Me Of My Hot Daughter: https://t.co/eNb9WR5TW3 https://t.co/ZpKteVUePV